In 2020 Sheikh Assim Huda answered a question about wife beating.
Following is a partial transcript. For further clarification links to a diversity of Islamic sources will be included at the bottom of post.
The general trend is Allah ordered men to be kind to their wives. You have to live with them – in what is normal, what is well known to people to be accepted.
However, what goes behind closed doors is something… There should be no outside interference.
The Prophet told the companions that a lot of women visited my wives and complain to them of their husband’s beating them.
By Allah, they are not from among the best of you. Meaning these men that beat their wives are not the righteous.
Now when we judge things, we don’t refer to the United Nations we don’t refer to the Geneva convention we don’t refer to man-made laws made by the disbelievers the kafir
If you go to verse 34 chapter 4 – you feer their disobedience… Third and final step you beat them… Do not draw blood or hit the face….
“As to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allah is Ever Most High, Most Great” [al-Nisa 4:34]
If a woman rebels against her husband and disobeys his commands, then he should follow this method of admonishing her, forsaking her in bed and hitting her. Hitting is subject to the condition that it should not be harsh or cause injury.
“1. First stage: The stage of advice, counseling and warning against Allah’s punishment. A husband must remind his wife of the importance of protecting his rights in Islam. This stage is a very kind and easy one. But, if this treatment does not work and proves to be ineffective, then the husband may resort to the next stage.
“2. Second stage: To leave the wife’s bed. Or, if one sleeps in the same bed with her, he will turn his back to her, not touch her, talk to her or have intercourse with her. This stage, as noticed, combines both strictness and kindness, although it is a very harsh practice on both. But, if this treatment does not work, then the husband may resort to the final stage of discipline explained below.
“3. Third and final stage: Beating without hurting, breaking a bone, leaving black or blue marks on the body, and avoiding hitting the face or especially sensitive places at any cost. The purpose of beating her is only to discipline and never retaliation or with desire to hurt by any means. Islam forbids severe beating as punishment.
“The Prophet (Peace be upon Him) said: “None of you should beat his wife like a slave-beating and then have intercourse with her at the end of the day”. [Bukhari #4908]
On Honor Killings
“In some traditional and tribal custom based societies, custom gives the male such a dominant role that if the honor of his womenfolk are perceived, even without proper verification, to have been violated by an action of promiscuity on her part, the man kills her to protect his honor. This situation has been hyped up in the media because some unscrupulous people who continue to do this and others who allow it to continue.
“The answer to this is simple. To begin with, people are not allowed to take the law into their own hands and punish in this manner based on unverified accusations of promiscuity, as the rules of testimony in Islam are very strict. Therefore, this is a direct violation of the Islamic law. If the court assesses the case as an outright premeditated murder, after considering all circumstances and receiving proofs conclusively, it becomes punishable by the Islamic law of equity and retribution in cases of premeditated murder.
“The unfortunate reality is that because secular laws are in place in these countries, and because politicians appease tribal and other leaders for political advantages, these unjust customs are allowed to continue. If the Islamic laws were established and executed, the severe punishments for fornication, adultery, murder, etc, would satisfy the Muslim population; that justice has been done, and this would curtail the sense of vengeance that one needs to